Monday, January 22, 2007

Soul Cravings

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Soul Cravings by Erwin RaphaelMcManus is a book of entries, (journal like), about the cravings of the soul, about the search for God and the deep desire to meet Him. An interesting read, where truth is scattered throughout and touches the places that are deep within and at times become difficult to think about, let alone talk about. Ever since I read the "Barbarian Way" by this author, I have wanted to look at another title. This one is reaching me. I love the way the author brings this down to my level. I understand, emotionally and spiritually the experiences of which he speaks in simple english. He talks a lot about longing to belong, looking for love and coming to the place where one knows the God is that place, first and foremost, and then extensions of that fall into place. That is my unsophisticated take on this book. I enjoy his upfrontedness. It does not offend me. This life is about realness. I like that.

These are some excerpts from "Entry #9". One example of how McManus speaks to me through this book.

"I meet people who are running from God, angry with God, and yet at the same time desperately searching for him. If God is love, it is maddening when we are running from God and yet searching for love."

"Sometimes the thing we want the most, we fear the most."

"When it comes to love, often we are our own worst enemies. When we've been hurt in the past, when we feel that love has betrayed us, we can easily become the enemies of love. To see if it's real, we do everything we can to destroy it. We tell ourselves we're testing it, but actually we're resisting it."

"The truth of the matter is that we're uncomfortable with God. We're disoriented by the way he loves."

"We want God to love us for an endless number of good reasons."

"At the same time, we find ourselves nervous before him because he sees right through us and knows everything that isn't lovable. He tells us that he is our place of rest and acceptance and unconditional love, yet we cannot reconcile this love. We know who we are. We know all that is unlovely within us. We wonder how we have become worthy of such love, and that's what worries us - we know we're not. So we escape our own sense of unworthiness; we run from God because we are certain that the closer we come to him, the more guilt and shame we will feel."

"It's just too hard to believe that if yu come near to God, you will find yourself not drowning in condemnation, but swimming in compassion.

Jesus called to all who were weary and who found their souls exhausted to come to him and find rest. He is telling us that God will be for us our place called home.

We run from God because we long to be loved and we have convinced ourselves that the One who is most loving could not and would not embrace us.

We run from the One our souls crave."

"....We have no real experience of unconditional love, and it goes without saying that conditional love always leaves us wanting. But at least with conditional love we have some control over the situation."

So as I read through these fragments of McManus' words..... I found myself so wonderfully blessed to know the Truth that is Jesus. The Grace that is Jesus. The Forgiveness that is Jesus. The Love that is Jesus. The journey through the cravings of this soul, has been long and continues to be one of returning to the knowledge that has come over time. He is Everything. He makes ALL things new. He is Love that does not die.

As McManus states......"It is insanity to run from God and search for love."

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